Hilarisch én herkenbaar: 10x tweets over zwanger zijn

07.02.2019 15:45

Wanneer je jezelf midden in de nacht op de bank jezelf overgeeft aan je cravings, terwijl je enkels gezwollen zijn en die baby in jou je ribben gebruikt als boksbal, bedenk dan één ding: je bent niet alleen. Dat blijkt wel uit deze hilarische tweets.

Och, mevrouw had het zwaar…

4-yr-old saw picture of me pregnant.
I explain that she was inside me. She thought for a bit then said:
“I never want to do that again.”
— Zoe vs. the Universe (@zoevsuniverse) July 21, 2014

Help, iemand?

Does the baby have access to my ribs? It feels like they’re bars and she’s an old timey prisoner with a tin mug
— christine teigen (@chrissyteigen) February 19, 2016

Wat leert zij nu weer op school…

7-year-old upon learning I am pregnant: “It’s the breastfeeding that will get ya. Breastfeeding is killer.”
— Rachel Held Evans (@rachelheldevans) October 21, 2015

Lees ook
Column Malu: ‘Ik ga het ‘zwanger zijn’ echt missen’ >

Proberen? Niet aan te raden.

Screaming out “BOOM PREGNANT!” during sex is never as funny as you think it will be.
— The Alicianater (@leechee420) February 14, 2013

Zegt genoeg…

Grocery store cashier: “Having a party tonight?” Me: “Nope, just pregnant.”
— Jill Krause (@babyrabies) October 23, 2016

Nu mag het.

me: i’m salty

me when i’m pregnant: i’m being salty for two
— discourse wallah (@krutika) April 14, 2016

#amen.

5 Stages of Pregnancy:

1: Crying

2: Peeing

3: Crying because you peed

4: Peeing because you’re crying

5: The toilet is your home now
— Sufficient Charm (@SufficientCharm) April 24, 2017

Geen woord aan gelogen.

Yelp review for pregnancy:
1/5 stars
Took way too long
Overpriced
Super uncomfortable & crowded
Aesthetically just very bad
No alcohol
— Sweatpants Cher ? (@House_Feminist) April 8, 2017

Het beste advies aan zwangere vrouwen OOIT.

Some days I want to time travel back to pregnant me and whisper, “Go take a nap. This is your last chance!”
— MyQuestionableLife (@2questionable) January 19, 2017